I am tired of people (my doctor included) telling me that my loss wasn't real, that it wasn't really a baby and that if I wasn't charting, I wouldn't have even known - is that supposed to make me feel better?!? It WAS a loss, it WAS a baby and I DO know I lost my precious child. Please give me time to grieve. If I make you uncomfortable, please understand I'm not doing it intentionally and leave me alone. I'm not acting this way to upset you, I am simply living my life the only way I know how. To quote someone else who has gone through this "There is nothing worse than being told your child doesn't exist. NOTHING. PLEASE DON'T CALL MY CHILD A CHEMICAL. GOD LOVES MY CHILD AND SO DO I." My child was a unique human being and I will never forget them. I am trying to use this for God's glory. My extended family is having a very difficult time understanding what I am going through. I think the only way you can really, truly understand it is to go through it yourself and I pray that my family never has to go through this themselves. It is something I wouldn't wish upon anyone. Before I am offended or hurt by my family or anyone else I need to try to step back and see if they are going through anything that might be causing them grief and try to be supportive of them. I need to love others in spite of the heartache they may cause me. Wow, that's much easier said than done!!! Retaliating for hurts caused by others will only push them away when I most need their prayers and encouragement. Lord, please help me forgive those that hurt me, everyday if necessary, and help me keep forgiving.
Ordinary Princess J
Showing posts with label loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label loss. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Sunday, July 12, 2009
The Beginning
The Beginning of our Secondary Infertility Journey
DH and I began trying to conceive again soon after DS's 1st birthday. We tried and were disappointed each month. In May of this year I bought the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility," and began charting. We conceived on our first cycle charting, in June, but lost the baby soon afterward. I was, and still am, heart broken. I miss the child that we lost. I wonder to myself why God would give me such a longing for another child if it's only going to bring heartache. I am looking for hope in the midst of my pain. I know that God can and will use this to help me grow closer to Him.
Ordinary Princess J
DH and I began trying to conceive again soon after DS's 1st birthday. We tried and were disappointed each month. In May of this year I bought the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility," and began charting. We conceived on our first cycle charting, in June, but lost the baby soon afterward. I was, and still am, heart broken. I miss the child that we lost. I wonder to myself why God would give me such a longing for another child if it's only going to bring heartache. I am looking for hope in the midst of my pain. I know that God can and will use this to help me grow closer to Him.
Ordinary Princess J
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